A month after our little cutie arrived into our lives and I’m starting to feel like myself again. I had a very easy birth and recovery, which went far more smoothly than I anticipated. Despite several pre surgery jitters, and a few freak outs before that big moment, the team of surgeons and Canossa Hospital made the experience easy and unintimidating. I didn’t anticipate how aware I would be during the c-section or how quickly the procedure would pass. I spent most of the first ten minutes revelling in how strange it was to be completely numb from the waist down, and staring at the huge digital clock to my right until I heard the strong cry of my little girl. The shock of the little squirming body held over the screen was overwhelming and exciting at the same time. Her vibrating cry was so much stronger than I imagined and her pale and blood covered body was pretty far from the picturesque newborn you imagine. For me she didn’t become fully real until they brought her into my recovery room a few hours later. The boy followed her and the nurses to observe them cleaning and of course to cut the infamous umbilical cord. I surveyed from a distance as they started to finish the surgery and even had a chance to hold her against my chest and squeeze in that necessary photo opportunity before she was whisked away for her check-up. Before I knew it I was being wheeled back to my room and greeted by friends and family with a slightly groggy head and still numb from waist down. It only took two hours before I was sitting up, socialising, and attempting my first try at breastfeeding. She stared into my eyes from the moment I held her and I felt the pull of our bond so strongly from that moment forward.
I never felt once I missed out on bonding with our baby by not going through with the conventional natural childbirth. Having the boy by my side was essential for keeping me calm. The worst part of the less than one hour procedure was how cold I felt before the surgery began and the daunting experience of the spinal. Nothing was painful, but more uncomfortable. I know I’ll feel less daunted next time around when I know exactly what to expect. I was put more at ease by talking to my doctor throughout the procedure, asking questions, and having the boy keep me occupied with everyday chat. It was over before I knew it and having a cute little baby to concentrate on really takes over any other fear or discomfort.
I’ll share more about our first week in the next post.