That’s it. We’ve come the the end of this evidently surprising, unexpectedly satisfying, and at times turbulent road. We welcome our baby girl tomorrow, and I’m very ready to say goodbye to the pregnancy segment of this story. I’ve learned a lot about myself and my relationships during this enlightening experience. My lifestyle changes have taught me patience, endurance, and responsibility. The boy and I have managed to become an even stronger team than I imagined possible, and it’s funny how easily some things will actually just fall into place. It feels good to say we are definitely ready, with just a few pre-surgery jitters lingering on my mind.
A few important things I’ve learned during pregnancy:
1. Everyone has an opinion. It doesn’t matter if they have had a baby, never had a baby, had 10 babies, or never even held a baby. They have an opinion. You will have questioning looks when you sip that one cup of coffee you are allowed, a list of a million things you can and can’t do from each and everyone, and if you have culturally diverse family and friends the advice will always be contradictory. Take everything in, learn from other mothers, but most importantly look things up yourself. Take pregnancy as a time to read up as much as possible about the whole 10 month journey as well as newborn care. We are so lucky to have the internet today and I have literally googled everything, devoured pregnancy and baby blogs, and ordered plenty of books. BabyCentre will be your best friend. Download the app, sign up for the emails and go from there.
2. You have far more energy if you nap. Nap whenever possible, especially if you have plans that evening. Sleep has made the difference between a great day and a bad day for me. I’m really lucky, and have had a very comfortable pregnancy. No morning sickness and I didn’t show until 20 something weeks, but fatigue is something that I didn’t escape. I found that even dozing for 20 mins made it easier for me to be out and about.
3. You husband/partner will not care as much as you do about all the details and facts about baby supplies. The boy is definitely going to be a hands on father. He loves kids, and is amazing at spoiling me day and night, waiting on me, making sure I have all the food and luxuries I need. He has taken all the cleaning responsibilities and has helped with all preparations, but he is not interested in which moses basket, car seat, or baby blanket we choose. He doesn’t care about the different brands of diaper rash cream or if we should go organic. Those are my choices and as much as he is happy to help with feeding or changing he doesn’t care which bottle she is actually using. All the details will most likely be yours. Take it as an opportunity to indulge in shopping.
4. The last month is terrible. No matter the situation you feel huge, tired, and far more swollen than any other point during your pregnancy. Do not plan any parties, big activities, or hosting duties. I had my baby shower about 3 weeks before the big day and that was the last bit of social activity for me. Since then I have either been in bed, taking long walks with the boy, or just enjoying quiet dinners at home. It’s a great time to rest up for your new arrival and pamper yourself with massages, pedicures, and chocolate. Don’t plan on stressing yourself out with much more. Buy most of your necessities before the last month hits so you can lounge around and admire your new nursery knowing you are fully prepared and ready for the new arrival.
5. You will hopefully find a few friends who understand exactly what you are going through or have gone through all this before. Hopefully they live a similar lifestyle to you or work in the same field. These girls will become your support system. I have become closer to a few of my yummy mummy friends who I used to hang out with pre baby bump. They have been amazingly supportive and informative throughout the entire process. They are the ones you’ll want to message daily and probably hang out with the most. Your life is about to change and it helps to have people around you who can relate to these changes. Their advice is what is calming and seeing the way they are with their children shows you that you don’t have to lose your entire identity, career, or social life after having a baby.
Hope this helps all the new mommies out there!